I have to admit I really like fast food. Most of it is pretty delicious, even though it's unhealthy. I think fast food restaurants are starting to get carried away with how unhealthy the food they serve is. Like the baconator? Why?! I bet it's all a conspiracy set up by Wilford Brimley. Think about it, the only thing that man's got going for him anymore are his diabetes commercials that air during every commercial break of the Price is Right. If that goes under, then what's Wilford got left? Not his movie career. A fat diabetic cowboy just isn't believable in any western movies. "There's a new sheriff in town and he's no one to mess with...unless you take his insulin away. Then he'll probably just pass out and die." It'd be like a five minute movie. He'd be completely out of work. He's probably the one whose going to Wendy's and hawking things like the Baconator. If people become less obese and less prone to acquiring diabetes, then what would Wilford do? Prostitution? Maybe, but I doubt it. That's also not a good occupation for diabetics.
And if Wilford is the one who's behind such greasy claptraps like the Baconator, I wonder what other ideas he had. Perhaps like "the Fryburger. Three hamburger patties topped a quarter pound of extra greasy Wendy's fries." Or maybe "the donutator. Two greasy burger patties between a bun composed of extra glazed Krispy Kreme Donuts." Perhaps he tried to reach out to Wendy's chief demographic of the later evening with the "Stonerburger. Three burger patties in a bun composed of the things you wrap eggrolls in topped with ketchup, mustard, maple syrup, Cheatos, Spaghettios, and sprinkles."
Most of the time when I go to fast food restaurants I try to skip the french fries in favor of a side salad. I rarely feel happy about eating fries. I usually feel like they're not going to come back out with a vengeance later. Why are those always served as a side anyway?! Fast food joints could probably lose some of the flack they get by offering something healthier as the standard side. Like mashed potatoes or something. Nobody doesn't like mashed potatoes. They're delish. I feel like they'd be less expensive too. There's two steps to making them. 1) Find potato. 2) Mash it. And they don't follow up with a heart attack later.
I know someone who doesn't like mashed potatoes. They make him gag horribly and induce vomiting.
ReplyDeleteOh right. I thought it was just baked potatoes.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first ate a Baconator, I felt terrible. Not because I was ashamed to be eating it, but I realized that the Baconator is basically how i construct every burger I make at home, except the Baconator has less bacon.
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